Only in pagan circles.
Christians will say God told them to do something. And they never scruple about talking to God.
But if you want weird religious experiences, talk to pagans. We've been kicked in the head, possessed, impregnated and more by our gods.
And I've been dead three times since my birthday. More specifically, I've been to the land of the dead twice, and dead twice.
I walked the path to the Land of the Dead the first time on November 15th in the Festival of Souls Labyrinth.
The Labyrinth is the same pattern from year to year. But every walk is different. I've done it three times in 13 years. The first, I walked and chatted with my three grandmothers. (maternal, paternal bio and paternal adoptive)
The second, right after I lost my mother and a good friend, was a dark walk down into darkness, with the candles dying in my wake. No one was there, except me.
This year was a quiet, meditative walk. There was only one other person in the labyrinth (the other cook) and we passed like shades, sometimes near, sometimes from afar. I understood then, there was no one in the labyrinth to see me or visit me from the other side. This was my journey. I was recreating a soul's journey to the Land of the Dead. I had to understand it. That I have to understand this, tells me I may be called on to serve as guide again.
I came to the center, lit some incense, breathed and grounded. Then, I stepped over the rows of candles and let myself out. Because when you serve Hermes Psychopompus you get a "Get out of Hades Free" card. My arthritic legs needed it.
On Saturday night, the 16th, Gabriel hosted the Primal rit.
We passed though the veil (we were draped in cloth and had it raised on the opposite side we entered, letting us into the circle) and were beyond the land of the living.
There was a tale of The Beast, and how, after death, we are allowed to run with the Beast, and dance, and explore, until we choose what we would like next.
We chanted and danced, literally until we dropped. Then we were raised back to our feet, back to life, and sent back to the Land of the Living.
It was a powerful thing and I was very quiet rest of the weekend.
After all, I had been dead and was back. That changes a great many things about perspective and attitude.
But after my return, I wasn't quite right. Things were dark, dim. Even a sunny afternoon felt bleak. And I was dim myself. Food didn't taste much. Nothing moved me. I hadn't smiled for weeks. And I realized, I had left something on the other side.
So, December 13, at midnight under the last dregs of the last full moon of the year, Gabriel sent me back to the Land of the Dead. It took very little, just energy straight into my brain.
I walked with Hermes on the banks of the Styx and Charon came for us. Hades and Persephone welcomed me. They said I had left a lot here and I needed to take it back with me.
Hades showed me a pile of scintillating glass, in a rainbow of colors. "All the bits of yourself you have thrown away and killed off. You need them back."
"How?"
Persephone put the glass into an amphora, raising it in a vortex and swirling it in. "Drink it down, dear. The glass will work its way out of your skin as you reabsorb the traits you need."
I stared at the vase, a good three feet tall and full of bits of sharp glass. "I can't."
"You will." Hades brooked no argument. He's a stern god and when he says, you do. He held the amphora and I swallowed, the glass flowing down my throat in a painful river. I drank forever, tears running down my face.
I went down, deep inside where the cauldron of sacred fire rides in my hips, burning an eternal green. I guided the glass to the fire, hoping to be more comfortable. I had cast these unpleasant bits out for a reason.
Persephone stroked my face when I was done and told me I had done well. Hades reminded me they didn't want to see me for a long while. They sent me back to Hermes who walked me to the banks of the Styx.
Just as Charon hove in sight, Hades came to us. "You need to take this with you." He gestured at a coffin.
I opened it. Inside was a middle aged woman, a younger version of me, either dead or sleeping. In her arms lay a drowned little girl of about three or four, her skin waterlogged and gray, lake-water soaking her hair and dress. Marie. The original personality.
"I can't carry the box," I said.
"It cannot stay here without you?"
I stared at Angel, the public personality who had gone into the box several years ago, leaving me in charge. I wanted to cry at the sight of Marie. It was my job to protect her in death, as none of us could in life. And here she was, out of her room, out of her bed, looking worse by the second.
A deep ripping started somewhere near my head and Zara stepped out of us. We hadn't seen her in months. She stood, tall, all in black, her long black hair flowing free down her back.
"I will keep them until the others return." She covered the dead ones up and closed the box with a sorceress' seal. She lifted the box which grew smaller in her hands. She pressed it down to the size of a wallet and tucked it into her robes, near where her heart would be, if it wasn't in a jar. (at least I hope she put it back in its jar after the rage of grief in '15)
Hades smiled as Charon beached. I thanked him, and thanked Charon, who grumbled about "tourists" as he shoved off. Hermes sat beside me with his invisibility cloak draped over us as we rode
I felt sicker and sicker, the glass riding badly. He held me and let me cuddle into his chest. One of the pieces of glass worked its way out of my skin on my chin, Clear now, all of me gone from it. He plucked it away and tossed it in the Styx.
"This is ridiculous. I can fix it but it will hurt a lot."
"Love, I just drank a pitcher of ground glass and had a whole alt ripped from me. Right now, pain is the least of my worries."
(about here, Megan opened the bedroom door and I came up briefly into the dream of reality. Gabriel sent me back down and he and Evan put their hands on me to help me stay down)
When we disembarked, he took me to a quiet part of the shore.
A gesture brought all of the glass out of me, shredding my skin. I screamed at that. He brought the brazier of scared fire out of me too. In a way only a god could, he passed the glass through the fire and it came up on the end of a glass blower's pipe.
"Blow, all you have and are and can be, blow it in here."
I blew the longest breath ever, draining everything to the tip of my toes. I took the fire back into myself, because it is mine. He tapped the glass off and said, "Look."
A beautiful, multicolored tempered glass heart lay in his hands. "It's still breakable, and as such will never be truly practical." He tipped it into my chest. "Go back now."
I sat upright and my eyes were clear. Evan was shaking his hand which was all pins and needles. Gabriel laughed at him. "It's been in the land of the dead, son, did you not expect it to feel odd?"
I told them all that had happened in the 18 minutes I had been gone.
Tonight was my most recent trip.
Tonight, my girlfriend's father died of stage four lung cancer. Eight months ago, it was a spot smaller than a dime. Tonight, it had eaten most of his lungs and metastasized into his bones. Agent Orange is a hell of a thing.
I went to the astral. He was waiting for me there, looking lost. And then looking a bit confused that I was the one to help him.
We walked the labyrinth together, his arthritis and the limp from his brain damage (car accident) gone. We talked. I promised to look after his daughter. It was a long walk to the center, even though it was only a seven-turn labyrinth. His grip on my hand got lighter and lighter.
At the center, he let go in a blinding flash of light and was gone.
I let myself out the usual way, stepping over two rows of candles.
When I opened my eyes, it was twenty minutes later than it had been.
He has gone swiftly and well.
Now, I'm hungry again. This veil crossing stuff will do that to a guy.
So there it is. Been dead twice and walked up to the gates of it two more times. It's been a rough forty days.
Thursday, December 26, 2019
Wednesday, December 11, 2019
How does it end?
I listen to the repeat of John Fugelsang's show as I drive to work in the morning. He does a segment called "Enhanced Interrogation" and always asks "How does this end?" I listen to Dean Obeidalla at night, and he always says "I can't predict what's next because I'm not a sociopath or a psychopath."
I am a psychopath. And I know how it ends.
1) The impeachment passes the House. The Senate either refuses to convict or refuses to hold the trial at all.
2) That man gets a second term, whether though Russian/Ukrainian interference, gerrymandering, general fraud or all the above.
3) Having declared Jews a Nationality as well as a Religion, he begins encouraging moves to Israel. Soon these become less encouraged and more compelled.
3a) Birthright citizenship is abolished.
4) He expands the concentration camp system. ICE gets less careful about making sure the people interned are not US citizens. When American citizens bring suit, Hispanic and Latin@ people will be declared automatically illegal aliens. More deaths. A major illness gets a foothold among the population and massive numbers of deaths occur. The bodies are buried in a mass grave, or cremated. The world is outraged.
5) The UN human rights commission and ACLU and major news outlets demand to see the camps. Observers are invited to do so, and promptly interned. Reporters are declared enemies of the state, of the people and of the world. Killing them is encouraged, jailing them is mandatory. When the UN logs a formal protest, it is evicted from New York City and the US unilaterally withdraws (via executive order, of course)
6) ALEC gets enough support for that constitutional convention. They only need 6 more states. With this group in charge, all changes will be made to benefit corporations and the rich. They'll start with a balanced budget amendment, and this will mandate cutting all social and benefit programs, in fact, everything but the military, to achieve.They may remove the very outdated 3rd Amendment (quartering soldiers), and use that as a springboard for others. The 13th, 15th and 19th are going to come under special fire.
They absolutely repeal the 22nd. The first is deeply abridged.
7) The 2024 election is rigged even harder than the 2020. Trump is either completely gone mentally or has died in office and been rigged up as an audioanimatronic. (h/t Norman Spinrad's "World War Last") Should this not be the case, he will have passed the presidency to either Don Jr. or Jared.
8) We have elections every 4 years, but the votes aren't actually counted and there is forever a Trump in the White House. Until they move it back to Trump Tower because Washington DC is a declasse address.
9) Under Mike Pence, the Evangelicals get their way in every particular. When Roe, followed by Griswold, is overturned, some of them lose their fervor and close their pocketbooks, so the next great enemy is created. As Roe was used to take the place of segregation, so they will use racial issues to take the place of Roe. America is a White Christian Country, and by their White Jesus, they're going to make it one.
Non-Christians are encouraged to convert. Soon encouraged becomes required. Places of worship are closed, meetings are banned, businesses are boycotted and sometimes targeted for violence. It starts with Jews, Muslims and Hindus, soon expanding to Sikhs, Buddists and pagans. Some white atheists begin quietly passing for Christian, as do some white non-Christians. Some manage to out-migrate.
Modesty culture becomes mandatory and sumptuary laws are seen again for the first time in centuries. Women begin to be shut out of some jobs, and then more and more.
The QUILTBAG is forced back into the closet, legislated against and tracked. Rumors of re-education/concentration camps abound.
10) As we have run out of Hispanic and Latin@ people, African Americans are declared African, not American. Under the 13th amendment alterations and destruction of birthright citizenship, they are illegal aliens and can either be interned or re-enslaved. Or deported. Those who can still afford it, escape to Mexico, Brazil and Canada. Some join the African Deportation, sponsoring their own ships, and planes, with captains guaranteed not to dump the passengers in the ocean.
Through it all, we keep cozying up to Russia. More and more Russian words begin to show up in everyday use, beginning with Fox News and carrying over to politicians. By 2032, it almost sounds as if we're speaking Nadsat.
We remain entangled in eternal wars around the world.
As rest of the world tries to move forward, we maintain our stubborn retreat. As the oceans rise, our scientists are banned from talking about climate change. People who can get out start trying, but soon the borders close.
The economy continues to be lopsided, many many low wage workers, a few very wealthy at the top. No middle class. Some people still identify as such and try to maintain the mid-20th centuries values from their grandparents and parents, but most do not. Corporations make the laws, alter the tax code to their benefits and nearly own the people outright. The Company Town makes an appearance, possibly in its shiny, futuristic disguise of an arcology.
How does it end? This nasty retreat into corporate feudalism?
I'm not sure it does. But this is where I see things going right now, barring some cataclysmic event.
I am a psychopath. And I know how it ends.
1) The impeachment passes the House. The Senate either refuses to convict or refuses to hold the trial at all.
2) That man gets a second term, whether though Russian/Ukrainian interference, gerrymandering, general fraud or all the above.
3) Having declared Jews a Nationality as well as a Religion, he begins encouraging moves to Israel. Soon these become less encouraged and more compelled.
3a) Birthright citizenship is abolished.
4) He expands the concentration camp system. ICE gets less careful about making sure the people interned are not US citizens. When American citizens bring suit, Hispanic and Latin@ people will be declared automatically illegal aliens. More deaths. A major illness gets a foothold among the population and massive numbers of deaths occur. The bodies are buried in a mass grave, or cremated. The world is outraged.
5) The UN human rights commission and ACLU and major news outlets demand to see the camps. Observers are invited to do so, and promptly interned. Reporters are declared enemies of the state, of the people and of the world. Killing them is encouraged, jailing them is mandatory. When the UN logs a formal protest, it is evicted from New York City and the US unilaterally withdraws (via executive order, of course)
6) ALEC gets enough support for that constitutional convention. They only need 6 more states. With this group in charge, all changes will be made to benefit corporations and the rich. They'll start with a balanced budget amendment, and this will mandate cutting all social and benefit programs, in fact, everything but the military, to achieve.They may remove the very outdated 3rd Amendment (quartering soldiers), and use that as a springboard for others. The 13th, 15th and 19th are going to come under special fire.
They absolutely repeal the 22nd. The first is deeply abridged.
7) The 2024 election is rigged even harder than the 2020. Trump is either completely gone mentally or has died in office and been rigged up as an audioanimatronic. (h/t Norman Spinrad's "World War Last") Should this not be the case, he will have passed the presidency to either Don Jr. or Jared.
8) We have elections every 4 years, but the votes aren't actually counted and there is forever a Trump in the White House. Until they move it back to Trump Tower because Washington DC is a declasse address.
9) Under Mike Pence, the Evangelicals get their way in every particular. When Roe, followed by Griswold, is overturned, some of them lose their fervor and close their pocketbooks, so the next great enemy is created. As Roe was used to take the place of segregation, so they will use racial issues to take the place of Roe. America is a White Christian Country, and by their White Jesus, they're going to make it one.
Non-Christians are encouraged to convert. Soon encouraged becomes required. Places of worship are closed, meetings are banned, businesses are boycotted and sometimes targeted for violence. It starts with Jews, Muslims and Hindus, soon expanding to Sikhs, Buddists and pagans. Some white atheists begin quietly passing for Christian, as do some white non-Christians. Some manage to out-migrate.
Modesty culture becomes mandatory and sumptuary laws are seen again for the first time in centuries. Women begin to be shut out of some jobs, and then more and more.
The QUILTBAG is forced back into the closet, legislated against and tracked. Rumors of re-education/concentration camps abound.
10) As we have run out of Hispanic and Latin@ people, African Americans are declared African, not American. Under the 13th amendment alterations and destruction of birthright citizenship, they are illegal aliens and can either be interned or re-enslaved. Or deported. Those who can still afford it, escape to Mexico, Brazil and Canada. Some join the African Deportation, sponsoring their own ships, and planes, with captains guaranteed not to dump the passengers in the ocean.
Through it all, we keep cozying up to Russia. More and more Russian words begin to show up in everyday use, beginning with Fox News and carrying over to politicians. By 2032, it almost sounds as if we're speaking Nadsat.
We remain entangled in eternal wars around the world.
As rest of the world tries to move forward, we maintain our stubborn retreat. As the oceans rise, our scientists are banned from talking about climate change. People who can get out start trying, but soon the borders close.
The economy continues to be lopsided, many many low wage workers, a few very wealthy at the top. No middle class. Some people still identify as such and try to maintain the mid-20th centuries values from their grandparents and parents, but most do not. Corporations make the laws, alter the tax code to their benefits and nearly own the people outright. The Company Town makes an appearance, possibly in its shiny, futuristic disguise of an arcology.
How does it end? This nasty retreat into corporate feudalism?
I'm not sure it does. But this is where I see things going right now, barring some cataclysmic event.
Thursday, October 31, 2019
Goals for November
November is a busy month.
Nov 14-17 is Festival of Souls. I am doing a class on death, one on Hellenism and helping with Olivia's handfasting. And I am The Kitchen Witch. Meals are planned, shopping lists made and submitted.
Nov 27-30 is Thanksgiving break. We're going to Lawton OK because Christopher's son should be here by then and we have presents for everyone: Baby, Dad, Mom and Brother. We are very excited although it will be crowded. Dad and Jen, and Mudd and me, Jon and Oli and Evan. Bun was considering joining us, but I think she's changed her mind
So, in light of all that, my goals for November
16 days to the gym
8 mystery shops
50,000 words written
5 lbs lost
300,000 points on KO Trivia
4 movies watched
4 books read
Baby blanket
Nursing shawl
mer-tail afghan
dragon hat
Reinbeers
Nov 14-17 is Festival of Souls. I am doing a class on death, one on Hellenism and helping with Olivia's handfasting. And I am The Kitchen Witch. Meals are planned, shopping lists made and submitted.
Nov 27-30 is Thanksgiving break. We're going to Lawton OK because Christopher's son should be here by then and we have presents for everyone: Baby, Dad, Mom and Brother. We are very excited although it will be crowded. Dad and Jen, and Mudd and me, Jon and Oli and Evan. Bun was considering joining us, but I think she's changed her mind
So, in light of all that, my goals for November
16 days to the gym
8 mystery shops
50,000 words written
5 lbs lost
300,000 points on KO Trivia
4 movies watched
4 books read
Baby blanket
Nursing shawl
mer-tail afghan
dragon hat
Reinbeers
Sunday, October 6, 2019
Clean energy is the future
The ordinary conservatives laugh at the idea of solar power. They've been told for 40 years that it's a joke. They believe climate change isn't happening, and renewable energy is a pipe dream.
Disney doesn't think it's a joke. 25% of the entire Disney resort in Florida runs on solar. 2 of the parks are completely powered by solar. For the record, the Disney resort is the size of San Francisco. Their solar farm produces 50 megawatts, enough to power 10,000 homes. It's set to halve their emissions. Disney takes global warming seriously because if Florida gets too hot, or is washed away, they lose millions a day.
(Forbes talks about the finacials of it here: https://www.forbes.com/sites/christopherhelman/2016/02/29/disney-world-taps-solar-power-with-mickey-mouse-pv-project)
Tokyo Disney uses solar for much of its electricity. Paris Disney uses geothermal.
They're also trying to make it pollinator friendly, a place for bees, birds and butterflies, in an effort to combat the species depredations.
Lego has gone all renewable as well, 3 years ahead of schedule.
https://www.good.is/articles/lego-renewable-energy
The fun part of this is that their new wind farm is made entirely of legos!
So, the largest media and theme park company, and the largest toy manufacturer. This is child's play, silliness, right? Wrong.
The US military, in an effort to be more self-sufficient, has gone heavily solar.
Many bases are partially solar powered by the 130 megawatts of solar farms. Military oil consumption fell 20% between 2007 and 2015. This reduces our dependence on foreign oil and keeps us safer in the field. 10-12% of casualties are fuel and water convoys. Long supply lines are the bane of any force, and equipping soldiers with their own gear to provide personal power instead of large generators is safer and more effective. It reduces the individual's load by about 25 lbs and also adds a stealth factor. Diesel generators are noisy and can give away locations.
https://solarmetric.com/learn/how-is-the-us-military-using-solar-power/
This article from 2017 is excellent, talking about the ways various branches are using renewable energy. "Marines in Afghanistan began carrying solar panels in 2009 to forward bases in battles with Taliban fighters. They used them to power batteries for communications, GPS and night-vision goggles. The panels not only reduced the need for convoys, they allowed marines to shut off generators, hushing operations and making them harder for enemies to detect."
https://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-military-green-energy-insight/u-s-military-marches-forward-on-green-energy-despite-trump-idUSKBN1683BL
Other companies are going solar, many choosing to own their solar panels outright
https://www.cnbc.com/2018/05/28/10-massive-corporations-going-big-on-solar-power.html
Ikea, Johnson & Johnson, even Macy's. Amazon and Costco.
Even Walmart is going green, using 100% renewable energy
https://www.conserve-energy-future.com/top-companies-that-are-going-green.php
Apparently there is money to be had by going green.
Companies, retailers, even the military are accepting the idea that the world is changing.
Maybe it's time to listen to them, and open some eyes.
Disney doesn't think it's a joke. 25% of the entire Disney resort in Florida runs on solar. 2 of the parks are completely powered by solar. For the record, the Disney resort is the size of San Francisco. Their solar farm produces 50 megawatts, enough to power 10,000 homes. It's set to halve their emissions. Disney takes global warming seriously because if Florida gets too hot, or is washed away, they lose millions a day.
(Forbes talks about the finacials of it here: https://www.forbes.com/sites/christopherhelman/2016/02/29/disney-world-taps-solar-power-with-mickey-mouse-pv-project)
They're also trying to make it pollinator friendly, a place for bees, birds and butterflies, in an effort to combat the species depredations.
Lego has gone all renewable as well, 3 years ahead of schedule.
https://www.good.is/articles/lego-renewable-energy
The fun part of this is that their new wind farm is made entirely of legos!
So, the largest media and theme park company, and the largest toy manufacturer. This is child's play, silliness, right? Wrong.
The US military, in an effort to be more self-sufficient, has gone heavily solar.
Many bases are partially solar powered by the 130 megawatts of solar farms. Military oil consumption fell 20% between 2007 and 2015. This reduces our dependence on foreign oil and keeps us safer in the field. 10-12% of casualties are fuel and water convoys. Long supply lines are the bane of any force, and equipping soldiers with their own gear to provide personal power instead of large generators is safer and more effective. It reduces the individual's load by about 25 lbs and also adds a stealth factor. Diesel generators are noisy and can give away locations.
https://solarmetric.com/learn/how-is-the-us-military-using-solar-power/
This article from 2017 is excellent, talking about the ways various branches are using renewable energy. "Marines in Afghanistan began carrying solar panels in 2009 to forward bases in battles with Taliban fighters. They used them to power batteries for communications, GPS and night-vision goggles. The panels not only reduced the need for convoys, they allowed marines to shut off generators, hushing operations and making them harder for enemies to detect."
https://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-military-green-energy-insight/u-s-military-marches-forward-on-green-energy-despite-trump-idUSKBN1683BL
Other companies are going solar, many choosing to own their solar panels outright
https://www.cnbc.com/2018/05/28/10-massive-corporations-going-big-on-solar-power.html
Ikea, Johnson & Johnson, even Macy's. Amazon and Costco.
Even Walmart is going green, using 100% renewable energy
https://www.conserve-energy-future.com/top-companies-that-are-going-green.php
Apparently there is money to be had by going green.
Companies, retailers, even the military are accepting the idea that the world is changing.
Maybe it's time to listen to them, and open some eyes.
Monday, September 23, 2019
Active travel planning
In August, Mudd and I have been married 30 years. It seems to call for more than dinner at the local casino.
So, we are traveling in March, during his spring break.
On March 22, we head to Florida, at some unreasonable hour. I figure we'll take a cooler with drinks and our suitcases. I'm hoping to not need a wheelchair, but I will take my cane.
We can grab lunch in Atlanta, probably Red Robin (gift card), with their unlimited fries.
I also like the idea of Bojangles chicken for dinner
We'll need cash for tolls.
Then we pull into the Rodeway Inn, check in and call it a night. The Rodeway serves breakfast every morning.
Sunday is a recovery day. We check the breakfast, check supplies, go to the store, set up a park bag, and sight see. We might go to Old Town and check it out. Perhaps a microwave lasagna for dinner.
I plan to carry soda because we are not on a dining plan, and it's $4.50.
Monday, we head to Kennedy Space Center. (tickets to be purchased in Oct with Sept's mystery shop money)
We'll have a look at some maps and decide what we most want to see.
Not sure about food (see what i have in gift cards)
Tuesday is a busy day. (tickets are acquired)
We eat early and drive over to the parks (parking fee) make Hollywood studios at Rope Drop.
All I really want here is Galaxy's Edge. I want to ride both rides, buy a spira at the Droid Depot (I promised to bring one home to Hermes for his shrine), eat a ronto wrap and generally bask.
Then we head to the Magic Kingdom for a late lunch at Liberty Tree Tavern, a ride on the Haunted Mansion and anything else I can talk Mudd into (Pirates of the Caribbean and the Liberty Belle riverboat are both on my list, maybe the Monsters Inc laugh floor comedy show.). Then, we monorail over and spend the evening at Epcot, exploring Future World, riding a few things. Maybe enjoy some shawarma as we see the water parade.
Wednesday is a recovery day. Sleep in, rest, swim if the weather suits.
Thursday is Epcot all day.
We'll take the shuttle, and ride the skyliner from Hollywood Studios to Epcot.
Then it's anything Mudd wants to see and do and ride. I think we're getting fish and chips from Yorkshire County Fish Shop for dinner. Maybe poutine and some snacky stuff for lunch.
Friday, we head back. We can do it all in a day, or stay a night in Atlanta as needed
So, we are traveling in March, during his spring break.
On March 22, we head to Florida, at some unreasonable hour. I figure we'll take a cooler with drinks and our suitcases. I'm hoping to not need a wheelchair, but I will take my cane.
We can grab lunch in Atlanta, probably Red Robin (gift card), with their unlimited fries.
I also like the idea of Bojangles chicken for dinner
We'll need cash for tolls.
Then we pull into the Rodeway Inn, check in and call it a night. The Rodeway serves breakfast every morning.
Sunday is a recovery day. We check the breakfast, check supplies, go to the store, set up a park bag, and sight see. We might go to Old Town and check it out. Perhaps a microwave lasagna for dinner.
I plan to carry soda because we are not on a dining plan, and it's $4.50.
Monday, we head to Kennedy Space Center. (tickets to be purchased in Oct with Sept's mystery shop money)
We'll have a look at some maps and decide what we most want to see.
Not sure about food (see what i have in gift cards)
Tuesday is a busy day. (tickets are acquired)
We eat early and drive over to the parks (parking fee) make Hollywood studios at Rope Drop.
All I really want here is Galaxy's Edge. I want to ride both rides, buy a spira at the Droid Depot (I promised to bring one home to Hermes for his shrine), eat a ronto wrap and generally bask.
Then we head to the Magic Kingdom for a late lunch at Liberty Tree Tavern, a ride on the Haunted Mansion and anything else I can talk Mudd into (Pirates of the Caribbean and the Liberty Belle riverboat are both on my list, maybe the Monsters Inc laugh floor comedy show.). Then, we monorail over and spend the evening at Epcot, exploring Future World, riding a few things. Maybe enjoy some shawarma as we see the water parade.
Wednesday is a recovery day. Sleep in, rest, swim if the weather suits.
Thursday is Epcot all day.
We'll take the shuttle, and ride the skyliner from Hollywood Studios to Epcot.
Then it's anything Mudd wants to see and do and ride. I think we're getting fish and chips from Yorkshire County Fish Shop for dinner. Maybe poutine and some snacky stuff for lunch.
Friday, we head back. We can do it all in a day, or stay a night in Atlanta as needed
Sunday, July 28, 2019
Needing Genre suggestions
So, it was suggested I try writing something I never have. I looked blankly at the guy and said "I'm not sure there is one."
According to my Backlist, I've written Horror, Urban fantasy, Fantasy (mythopoetic and high fantasy), SF (including post apocalyptic, cyberpunk, steampunk, dark future), Contemporary, and Historical (medieval, age of sail, western, 1920s, depression, 1970s)
What am I missing?
Backlist, including Patreon shorts.
Horror 1 novel, 7 shorts
Alive on the Inside
Blood Red Rose
Firstfruits
Fool's Taj Mahal
Neighbors
Not Like Other Girls
Show your faces
Still Rolling
~~~~
Urban Fantasy: 3 novels, 25 shorts
Power in the Blood
Spellbound Desire
Wild Hunt
Ain't No Easy Run
Between Despair and Ecstasy
Blue Mistletoe
By the Fire With Care
Cake under the Mistletoe
Color of Magic, color of money
According to my Backlist, I've written Horror, Urban fantasy, Fantasy (mythopoetic and high fantasy), SF (including post apocalyptic, cyberpunk, steampunk, dark future), Contemporary, and Historical (medieval, age of sail, western, 1920s, depression, 1970s)
What am I missing?
Backlist, including Patreon shorts.
Horror 1 novel, 7 shorts
Alive on the Inside
Blood Red Rose
Firstfruits
Fool's Taj Mahal
Neighbors
Not Like Other Girls
Show your faces
Still Rolling
~~~~
Urban Fantasy: 3 novels, 25 shorts
Power in the Blood
Spellbound Desire
Wild Hunt
Ain't No Easy Run
Between Despair and Ecstasy
Blue Mistletoe
By the Fire With Care
Cake under the Mistletoe
Color of Magic, color of money
Crossroads
Deadman's Curve
Five Time Loser
Fruits of thine
His Wicked Way
Hunger for the Edge
Illusions of Safety
Looking Down the Road
Miskatonic Mistletoe
Prey
Riding the Edge
S is for Succubus
Serpents
Sideshow Roses
Singing Up the Moon
Siul a ruhn
Songs for Guitar and French Harp
That's How we Roll
Tuition Fees
Fantasy: 5 shorts
Rock us all Down
Sweet Persuasion
Worth the Woe
Outfoxed
Wishing Away
~~~~
SF:
Red Velvet
Post Apoc SF: 1 novel, 1 short
Barbarossa's Bitch
That Time they Talk About
Space Opera: 1 novel, 7 shorts
Heart's Bounty
The Arcology Job
Breathe Deep
For Love of Etarin
Plumbing the Depths
Pride of the Rangers
Recovery
Welcome Winter
Dark future: 4 novels, 6 shorts
Anthony
Glad Hands
Nikochan
Nikolai
Breakers
A Gift of Scars
Gourmet Etude
One gift at a time
Orion Rising
A Visit from Nikolai
Cyberpunk: 1 novel, 5 shorts
Hard Reboot
Chained to the Wheel
DoubleDealing
Eight Days Ablaze
Pushing the Boundaries of Reality
Swimming through the Net
Steampunk 1 novel 10 shorts
The Sweet Science
Adventuresses
Cherry Tart
The Devil's Children
Experiments
Five to One
Induced Paroxysms
Meanwhile, Back at the Ranch
Moved to Action
Skyrat
Skyway Robbery
Contemporary 1 novel 18 shorts
Shell-shocked
Captain's Orders
ChainMale
Change of Plans
Collared Hearts
Drive
Fannish Activity
Frosted Hearts
Hot Load
Imperial Entanglements
Long Term
Master Bear
Out of Options
Raising the Dead
Paying Forfeits
Stolen Chocolate Tastes Sweetest
Talk like a pirate day
Thigh to thigh
Tiochfaidh ar la
~~~~
Historical:
Medieval: 1 novel, 2 shorts
Heart of a Forest
Under the Skirts of Sherwood
Waterwheel
Age of Sail: 2 novels, 1 short
Privateer's Treasure
Privateer Plundered
Blood Rubies
Western: 1 short
Showdown at Yellowstone River
1920s adventure: 2 novels, 2 shorts
Curse of the Pharaoh's Manicurists
Terror of the Frozen North
Rock the Casbash
Stolen by Slaves of the Monkey God
Depression: 1 short
Man Hunt
1970s: 1 short
Racing the Past
Hunger for the Edge
Illusions of Safety
Looking Down the Road
Miskatonic Mistletoe
Prey
Riding the Edge
S is for Succubus
Serpents
Sideshow Roses
Singing Up the Moon
Siul a ruhn
Songs for Guitar and French Harp
That's How we Roll
Tuition Fees
Fantasy: 5 shorts
Rock us all Down
Sweet Persuasion
Worth the Woe
Outfoxed
Wishing Away
~~~~
SF:
Red Velvet
Post Apoc SF: 1 novel, 1 short
Barbarossa's Bitch
That Time they Talk About
Space Opera: 1 novel, 7 shorts
Heart's Bounty
The Arcology Job
Breathe Deep
For Love of Etarin
Plumbing the Depths
Pride of the Rangers
Recovery
Welcome Winter
Dark future: 4 novels, 6 shorts
Anthony
Glad Hands
Nikochan
Nikolai
Breakers
A Gift of Scars
Gourmet Etude
One gift at a time
Orion Rising
A Visit from Nikolai
Cyberpunk: 1 novel, 5 shorts
Hard Reboot
Chained to the Wheel
DoubleDealing
Eight Days Ablaze
Pushing the Boundaries of Reality
Swimming through the Net
Steampunk 1 novel 10 shorts
The Sweet Science
Adventuresses
Cherry Tart
The Devil's Children
Experiments
Five to One
Induced Paroxysms
Meanwhile, Back at the Ranch
Moved to Action
Skyrat
Skyway Robbery
Contemporary 1 novel 18 shorts
Shell-shocked
Captain's Orders
ChainMale
Change of Plans
Collared Hearts
Drive
Fannish Activity
Frosted Hearts
Hot Load
Imperial Entanglements
Long Term
Master Bear
Out of Options
Raising the Dead
Paying Forfeits
Stolen Chocolate Tastes Sweetest
Talk like a pirate day
Thigh to thigh
Tiochfaidh ar la
~~~~
Historical:
Medieval: 1 novel, 2 shorts
Heart of a Forest
Under the Skirts of Sherwood
Waterwheel
Age of Sail: 2 novels, 1 short
Privateer's Treasure
Privateer Plundered
Blood Rubies
Western: 1 short
Showdown at Yellowstone River
1920s adventure: 2 novels, 2 shorts
Curse of the Pharaoh's Manicurists
Terror of the Frozen North
Rock the Casbash
Stolen by Slaves of the Monkey God
Depression: 1 short
Man Hunt
1970s: 1 short
Racing the Past
Thursday, July 4, 2019
Semi-Annual Where to Find Me post
A guy's gotta have a social media presence.
Here's where to find me. This is the primary blog.
Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/NickRowan
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/nick.rowan.9678
Twitter: https://twitter.com/NickRowan16
I usually schedule the posts for this
Tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/nicholasrowan
A mixed bag of politics, crafting and geekery
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nick.w.rowan/
Cat pictures and drag
Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/valarltd/
Youtube, with Drag videos under videos
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRY6DbSZBTN42bLPxDGCgmA
The Disney Trip Saving and plan
https://nicksfreedisneytrip.blogspot.com/
Here's where to find me. This is the primary blog.
Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/NickRowan
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/nick.rowan.9678
Twitter: https://twitter.com/NickRowan16
I usually schedule the posts for this
Tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/nicholasrowan
A mixed bag of politics, crafting and geekery
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nick.w.rowan/
Cat pictures and drag
Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/valarltd/
Youtube, with Drag videos under videos
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRY6DbSZBTN42bLPxDGCgmA
The Disney Trip Saving and plan
https://nicksfreedisneytrip.blogspot.com/
Wednesday, July 3, 2019
Music and craft for July 3
Day 3:
A Song that reminds you of Summertime
Came out around the one summer I had a serious boyfriend...
Day 3:
I love this.
A Song that reminds you of Summertime
Came out around the one summer I had a serious boyfriend...
Day 3:
Tuesday, July 2, 2019
Monday, July 1, 2019
Project July
So July has become Intake Month
Books. Movies.
And handwork.
July 1, Red
The blankie for the Arriving Alexander
Books. Movies.
And handwork.
July 1, Red
The blankie for the Arriving Alexander
Musical July
This looked like fun and an excuse to step up my posting.
A song I like with a color in the Title.
Behind Blue Eyes, by the Who.
A song I like with a color in the Title.
Behind Blue Eyes, by the Who.
Sunday, June 30, 2019
[Pagan] Primal stuff
Church...got weird last night
Not the ritual itself. It was a powerful guided meditation and Grandmother was with us and in us. A good evening..
But the cards. I always do tarot readings, being too old and creaky to get on the primal pad and throw my church folk around.
Gabriel hasn't had a reading in a long time. But they spoke up last night. They told him Megan was good for him but someone, who wasn't Finn, was going to be a problem. 7 of swords. deceit, deception, cleverness.
The whole room had a literal "Lord is it I?" moment. And I'm over here, rubbing off the paint marks on my face.... Very Godspell moment. Esp when the cards--my own deck the traitors--pointed square at me and I launched into "Entry of the Gladiators."
We had already had an interesting talk about where I fit in to Primali paganism.
The problem, Faith is not a gift I am blessed with. To quote Terry Prachett: Witches don't believe in gods. They know them too well for that. It would be like believing in the postman.
Gabriel said everything is an act of faith, including that the table will stay solid and the chair will hold me. I agreed on a philosophical level but mentioned that most people live on a material level.
Gabriel excused himself to the bathroom, and the seat of the chair spontaneously cracked under me.
Sometimes the gods have to hit me upside the head.
In the end, the role for me is administrative. I'm not suited to spiritual leadership, having no spirit of my own. But I can organize.
And maybe I shouldn't check into group chat with "Operative Iscariot reporting" anymore.
Not the ritual itself. It was a powerful guided meditation and Grandmother was with us and in us. A good evening..
But the cards. I always do tarot readings, being too old and creaky to get on the primal pad and throw my church folk around.
Gabriel hasn't had a reading in a long time. But they spoke up last night. They told him Megan was good for him but someone, who wasn't Finn, was going to be a problem. 7 of swords. deceit, deception, cleverness.
The whole room had a literal "Lord is it I?" moment. And I'm over here, rubbing off the paint marks on my face.... Very Godspell moment. Esp when the cards--my own deck the traitors--pointed square at me and I launched into "Entry of the Gladiators."
We had already had an interesting talk about where I fit in to Primali paganism.
The problem, Faith is not a gift I am blessed with. To quote Terry Prachett: Witches don't believe in gods. They know them too well for that. It would be like believing in the postman.
Gabriel said everything is an act of faith, including that the table will stay solid and the chair will hold me. I agreed on a philosophical level but mentioned that most people live on a material level.
Gabriel excused himself to the bathroom, and the seat of the chair spontaneously cracked under me.
Sometimes the gods have to hit me upside the head.
In the end, the role for me is administrative. I'm not suited to spiritual leadership, having no spirit of my own. But I can organize.
And maybe I shouldn't check into group chat with "Operative Iscariot reporting" anymore.
June was quite a month
It was a difficult month and I was sick through much of it. I caught a cold I had trouble shaking, the endless storms have played havoc with my arthritis, and I have a boil in a place that bends with every other step. Ouch.
Mudd had his dental surgery. Eating has been a challenge, without any back molars. I have an omelet maker, and it was a good $4 spent. We're getting tired of eggs and pasta.
We've almost got enough for Gabriel's surgery and we should have the last $120 by the 22nd when he goes for surgery.
I'm under an audit from unemployment and can't get paid until it's finished. I've sent out a lot of job apps. So far no leads have panned out. Still working at Michaels.
I got to be a casualty role player and spend a couple days with a "compoundly fractured" leg so the national guard could practice field medicine.
Both my girls announced their engagement. Bun is getting married in June of 2020 in Detroit. Oli is getting handfasted at Festival of Souls in November of this year, and formally married in Oct 2020.
Oli's boy, Evan has a new job. He went to the Queer Youth Job Fair and is working for Macy's.
Dad, however, and I quote "Gave Jen and me more ammunition for placing him in a home." He is a heart patient. When he showed up at the cardiologist's office, they reminded him his appointment was in July, not June. He also went for a low shot while playing pickleballs, fell and hurt his back. He's seeing the orthopedist this week, since he's not feeling better.
And I made my drag debut this month.
I performed at open stage, and did a paid gig for a friend.
I really enjoy it.
not sure if I'm hitting open stage this week or not.
Mudd had his dental surgery. Eating has been a challenge, without any back molars. I have an omelet maker, and it was a good $4 spent. We're getting tired of eggs and pasta.
We've almost got enough for Gabriel's surgery and we should have the last $120 by the 22nd when he goes for surgery.
I'm under an audit from unemployment and can't get paid until it's finished. I've sent out a lot of job apps. So far no leads have panned out. Still working at Michaels.
I got to be a casualty role player and spend a couple days with a "compoundly fractured" leg so the national guard could practice field medicine.
Both my girls announced their engagement. Bun is getting married in June of 2020 in Detroit. Oli is getting handfasted at Festival of Souls in November of this year, and formally married in Oct 2020.
Oli's boy, Evan has a new job. He went to the Queer Youth Job Fair and is working for Macy's.
Dad, however, and I quote "Gave Jen and me more ammunition for placing him in a home." He is a heart patient. When he showed up at the cardiologist's office, they reminded him his appointment was in July, not June. He also went for a low shot while playing pickleballs, fell and hurt his back. He's seeing the orthopedist this week, since he's not feeling better.
And I made my drag debut this month.
I performed at open stage, and did a paid gig for a friend.
I really enjoy it.
not sure if I'm hitting open stage this week or not.
Saturday, June 8, 2019
Saturday, May 18, 2019
End of an Era
Next August, for the first time in 12 years, there will be no Sparrow at the High School.
Bun graduated in 2010
Obi in 2013
Jon in 2016
And Oli-Chan last night.
My kids are all out of high school. It's been a long 28 years since I started Project Parent.
Now, it moves into the Advisory phase instead of the Active phase.
Project Grandparent has begun.
Jonner, Oli, Gabriel, Megan and Obi, with my grandson, Hunter Blackowl. He's Kiowa. His mom is Caddo. His little brother (Chris' son) is due in early November.
Hunter isn't sure about grandparents. He looked at Obi, looked at Jonner, announced "Sparrow!"--which is what he calls Obi--and glomped Jonner. He has been Uncle Jon's bestest buddy all weekend. He dapped Gabriel.
Me? I got a goodbye wave and felt accomplished. He's sweet, smart, opinionated, and very very patient with the grownups. He was also very tired when we said goodbye, and was probably asleep before they got to the hotel.
We're going down to see them for Thanksgiving, since Mama will be in no shape to drive 9 hours. My dad and I figure we'll manage the meal and all for her.
I have a grandson! And he's a doll. Can't wait to meet his mama and little brother at Thanksgiving.
Bun graduated in 2010
Obi in 2013
Jon in 2016
And Oli-Chan last night.
My kids are all out of high school. It's been a long 28 years since I started Project Parent.
Now, it moves into the Advisory phase instead of the Active phase.
Project Grandparent has begun.
Jonner, Oli, Gabriel, Megan and Obi, with my grandson, Hunter Blackowl. He's Kiowa. His mom is Caddo. His little brother (Chris' son) is due in early November.
Hunter isn't sure about grandparents. He looked at Obi, looked at Jonner, announced "Sparrow!"--which is what he calls Obi--and glomped Jonner. He has been Uncle Jon's bestest buddy all weekend. He dapped Gabriel.
Me? I got a goodbye wave and felt accomplished. He's sweet, smart, opinionated, and very very patient with the grownups. He was also very tired when we said goodbye, and was probably asleep before they got to the hotel.
We're going down to see them for Thanksgiving, since Mama will be in no shape to drive 9 hours. My dad and I figure we'll manage the meal and all for her.
I have a grandson! And he's a doll. Can't wait to meet his mama and little brother at Thanksgiving.
Saturday, May 4, 2019
Planning presents
I was thinking today of a Fisher-Price tape player Bun had when she was a toddler. She loved listening to the Cats soundtrack.
When GrandBabyTBA arrives in November, we're going down for Thanksgiving (about 2 weeks later). There should be presents for Mom&Dad (nursing shawl, baby sling, several diaper packages), presents for the baby (hooded towels, special blanket) and presents for Hunter: bath toy and music.
(Christmas gifts will also be delivered at this time to be tucked back for the holiday)
I checked. there are childrens MP3 players....
Hunter may get a full player, with songs his aunties and uncle and Parrow loved, songs his grandparents loved and other fun stuff.
What would YOU put on a playlist for a 4-5 year old?
I'm thinking
Cats Soundtrack
A fair bunch of Disney
Folk music:
On top of Old Smokey
Polly Wolly Doodle
Erie Canal
Clementine
Puff the Magic Dragon
Bicycle Built for Two
Home on the Range
John Jacob Jingelheimer Schmidt.
Froggie went a courting
I've been working on the Railroad
Shenandoah
oh Susannah.
Old Dan Tucker
Big Rock Candy mountain
Wabash Cannonball
The Muffin Man
A Daisy A Day Oldies:
Yellow Submarine This land is your land
Kokomo Stairway to Heaven Secret Agent Man Run run away On the Road Again
Daydream Believer
Silver Wings
Not Fade Away Kentucky Rain Bohemian Rhapsody Wichita Lineman
Little Old Lady from Pasadena
White Rabbit
500 Miles
Kid Music: Lollipop Tree Que sera sera Knick Knack Paddywhack Ballad of Davy Crockett Big Bag John. You can't roller skate in a buffalo herd Musical Theatre
Do Re mi My Favorite Things Edelweiss Rainbow connection The Unicorn Song Happiness Good Morning (Singing in the Rain) Shy (Once Upon a Mattress) Any Dream Will Do All good Gifts Candy man Seventy Six Trombones Gary Indiana I won't grow up Razzle Dazzle
They call the wind Mariah Camelot
Good morning Starshine Age of Aquarius Footloose
Corner of the sky
Beautiful Land
I am the Pirate King
Silly Songs Snoopy vs the Red Baron Hot Rod Lincoln Monster Mash Hello muddah, Hello Faddah Eat it Old time Rock and Roll Auld Lang Syne Dancing in the Street Ghostbusters Purple people Eater Etc. oak and ash and thorn
Firebird's child
Rabbit's Song'
Graveyard picnic
Shiver my timbers
Taking suggestion before I start in on my music collection
A Daisy A Day Oldies:
Yellow Submarine This land is your land
Kokomo Stairway to Heaven Secret Agent Man Run run away On the Road Again
Daydream Believer
Silver Wings
Not Fade Away Kentucky Rain Bohemian Rhapsody Wichita Lineman
Little Old Lady from Pasadena
White Rabbit
500 Miles
Kid Music: Lollipop Tree Que sera sera Knick Knack Paddywhack Ballad of Davy Crockett Big Bag John. You can't roller skate in a buffalo herd Musical Theatre
Do Re mi My Favorite Things Edelweiss Rainbow connection The Unicorn Song Happiness Good Morning (Singing in the Rain) Shy (Once Upon a Mattress) Any Dream Will Do All good Gifts Candy man Seventy Six Trombones Gary Indiana I won't grow up Razzle Dazzle
They call the wind Mariah Camelot
Good morning Starshine Age of Aquarius Footloose
Corner of the sky
Beautiful Land
I am the Pirate King
Silly Songs Snoopy vs the Red Baron Hot Rod Lincoln Monster Mash Hello muddah, Hello Faddah Eat it Old time Rock and Roll Auld Lang Syne Dancing in the Street Ghostbusters Purple people Eater Etc. oak and ash and thorn
Firebird's child
Rabbit's Song'
Graveyard picnic
Shiver my timbers
Taking suggestion before I start in on my music collection
Monday, April 15, 2019
The Black Passenger
I am depressed.
As in clinically.
And I have a shiny new Zoloft prescription for it. I started taking it Thursday night.
I didn't expect it to work nearly this quickly.
What a difference having the good slime makes.
I no longer feel as if I'm wearing lead long johns. Every move is not a struggle through molasses.
I wake up, as in actually feel awake, instead of the somnambulism of the past few weeks.
I don't get drowsy during the day.
Most of all, I don't hurt nearly as much. (that could be restarting the Meloxicam)
I walked through Kroger yesterday, something I haven't done since November.
I'm not chewing my cuticles either. I bit off a couple hangnails, but didn't continue worrying my skin until I bled. This is huge progress.
The Black Passenger has disembarked, hopefully for a little while.
As in clinically.
And I have a shiny new Zoloft prescription for it. I started taking it Thursday night.
I didn't expect it to work nearly this quickly.
What a difference having the good slime makes.
I no longer feel as if I'm wearing lead long johns. Every move is not a struggle through molasses.
I wake up, as in actually feel awake, instead of the somnambulism of the past few weeks.
I don't get drowsy during the day.
Most of all, I don't hurt nearly as much. (that could be restarting the Meloxicam)
I walked through Kroger yesterday, something I haven't done since November.
I'm not chewing my cuticles either. I bit off a couple hangnails, but didn't continue worrying my skin until I bled. This is huge progress.
The Black Passenger has disembarked, hopefully for a little while.
Monday, April 1, 2019
April Fool in my house
Pregnancy jokes are a family tradition in the Sparrow clan. Except that they are almost never jokes.
Today, I got two texts, from Obi and Oli (oldest son, youngest daughter) both reading "Congratulations, Grandma." I expected, but never got one from oldest daughter Bun. (she forgot)
Turns out, not a joke. And there are ultrasounds to prove it.
Obi-Wan Chrisobi has a girlfriend, and she is due Nov 9. Isha (Lucia) is a c-store manager and has a son who will be 4 in about a week.
I knew they were serious when Obi took her to meet his grandpa.
They aren't getting married, because it will foul up the insurance and Chris' disability.
But they are together and serious, and will get married when their finances are better.
So, the next generation arrives in November, a Scorpio to start things off.
I'm excited and a little scared and a lot worried.
Today, I got two texts, from Obi and Oli (oldest son, youngest daughter) both reading "Congratulations, Grandma." I expected, but never got one from oldest daughter Bun. (she forgot)
Turns out, not a joke. And there are ultrasounds to prove it.
Obi-Wan Chrisobi has a girlfriend, and she is due Nov 9. Isha (Lucia) is a c-store manager and has a son who will be 4 in about a week.
I knew they were serious when Obi took her to meet his grandpa.
They aren't getting married, because it will foul up the insurance and Chris' disability.
But they are together and serious, and will get married when their finances are better.
So, the next generation arrives in November, a Scorpio to start things off.
I'm excited and a little scared and a lot worried.
Saturday, February 23, 2019
A most difficult week
I worked Sunday and left work dragging. Still had to grocery shop and plan and do laundry and all the second shift stuff.
Monday I was off. And it was glorious. I kind of goofed around most of it, taking things easy.
Tuesday was NOT a good day.
When the bubblegum machine hits the jackpot in your rearview at 430 AM, you know it's bad. The cop realized his error when he saw the middle aged white schoolbus driver. Who actually lived on the street he had tailed me from.
This was a nuisance stop, a driving while black bust if possible. But he was of an age all he saw was Mama going to work behind the wheel. I got a warning for my license plate light being out.
The weather has been in my joints and I got stuck in my recliner. I think I need to elevate it about 4 inches. After 5 attempts, the guys brought me over a dining chair. I levered myself into that and stood, creakily, from there.
Then the toilet needed plunging but i lacked the strength to manage. Jon finished it up and I went to bed in tears, terrified but feeling this frail at 51.
Wednesday, money we had been waiting for arrived, so that was good, but stressful. Many bills were paid and the monthly budget hole was eliminated. And I noticed a pimple on the inside of my right forearm. It didn't pop, but put out hard stuff. I left it alone after it was empty.
Thursday sucked.
I had an accident with the schoolbus. Barely brushed the corner of my neighbor and knocked my mirror off-kilter.
And there was a safety meeting.
I was over-emotional and felt like crying all evening. My wife was making Mood Soup, a vile concoction that is the best thing in the world for PMS. So I went home with Gabriel for a bowl of it.
And promptly fell up the steps of the veranda.
The neighborhood got an earful about them being cold and wet and hard and cold and hard and ow and wet. With a lot of "fuck" interspersed.
The soup wasn't even ready.
I went home, laid our my clothes and took Vincent (my stuffed panda with a unicorn horn and wings) to bed.
Friday,
The pimple had swollen and gone pus-filled and had a saucer sized red raised area around it. Spider bite. I spent 20 minutes trying to get an appointment with my doctor who couldn't see me for 2 weeks. After work I went to Urgent Care. I'm on powerful antibiotics. I called off work today.
I also didn't get home until 11 PM, having spent 16 hours in Collierville
It's been a week.
But we've got plenty of food instead of an empty pantry, and our bills are paid until the middle of next month. I'm not unhappy, just a bit uncomfortable.
Monday I was off. And it was glorious. I kind of goofed around most of it, taking things easy.
Tuesday was NOT a good day.
When the bubblegum machine hits the jackpot in your rearview at 430 AM, you know it's bad. The cop realized his error when he saw the middle aged white schoolbus driver. Who actually lived on the street he had tailed me from.
This was a nuisance stop, a driving while black bust if possible. But he was of an age all he saw was Mama going to work behind the wheel. I got a warning for my license plate light being out.
The weather has been in my joints and I got stuck in my recliner. I think I need to elevate it about 4 inches. After 5 attempts, the guys brought me over a dining chair. I levered myself into that and stood, creakily, from there.
Then the toilet needed plunging but i lacked the strength to manage. Jon finished it up and I went to bed in tears, terrified but feeling this frail at 51.
Wednesday, money we had been waiting for arrived, so that was good, but stressful. Many bills were paid and the monthly budget hole was eliminated. And I noticed a pimple on the inside of my right forearm. It didn't pop, but put out hard stuff. I left it alone after it was empty.
Thursday sucked.
I had an accident with the schoolbus. Barely brushed the corner of my neighbor and knocked my mirror off-kilter.
And there was a safety meeting.
I was over-emotional and felt like crying all evening. My wife was making Mood Soup, a vile concoction that is the best thing in the world for PMS. So I went home with Gabriel for a bowl of it.
And promptly fell up the steps of the veranda.
The neighborhood got an earful about them being cold and wet and hard and cold and hard and ow and wet. With a lot of "fuck" interspersed.
The soup wasn't even ready.
I went home, laid our my clothes and took Vincent (my stuffed panda with a unicorn horn and wings) to bed.
Friday,
The pimple had swollen and gone pus-filled and had a saucer sized red raised area around it. Spider bite. I spent 20 minutes trying to get an appointment with my doctor who couldn't see me for 2 weeks. After work I went to Urgent Care. I'm on powerful antibiotics. I called off work today.
I also didn't get home until 11 PM, having spent 16 hours in Collierville
It's been a week.
But we've got plenty of food instead of an empty pantry, and our bills are paid until the middle of next month. I'm not unhappy, just a bit uncomfortable.
Wednesday, January 23, 2019
Tumblr thinks this is porn
Tumblr has new policies and I got flagged. A lot.
This one just amuses me.
Screencaps from the Smallville episode Talisman Season 3. Okay, I’m obsessive.
That first is a very provocative setup, looked at from a Kink PoV. Hands clasped behind his back. This is a common waiting position. it is strong and contemplative body language. It is a mark of confidence. It’s also a comfortable way to wait. But juxtapose that with the only color in that part of the scene, the red ropes. Behind the back is also the position for handcuffs. it is a display position for bondage.
And that scene goes right into a conversation where EVERYTHING sounds like a triple entendre. It has a very coded feeling to it, probably given the actor’s age, and is almost a dance of seduction. The way he lingers over certain words, including the lengthy pause before “special” makes the average viewer want a shower.
The scenes at the Kwache burial grounds are one of the few times we see Lionel in strong natural lighting. He is a creature of the indoors, the office, the mansion. Even at Lex’s funeral, he it was an overcast day. The picture on the last row make me wibble. The way he fingers the leather on his wrists. This is surely not meant to be quite so suggestive, implying he is one of these men who hold so much control by day that he finds relief on rare occasion by giving it all up.
And this is me being gratuitous. because Hot.
Too much analysis of 10 year old TV viewed as coded porn.
Anyway, Tumblr has me reviewing a bunch of old posts, everything from Halloween shots to a sexy muse photodump. This one just needed to be saved for the commentary.
Anyway, Tumblr has me reviewing a bunch of old posts, everything from Halloween shots to a sexy muse photodump. This one just needed to be saved for the commentary.
Monday, January 14, 2019
Cooking thoughts from Sunday Night
I'm trying the Stew in a Freezer Bag thing, in hopes of reducing our frozen pizza consumption and increasing our vegetable intake. Also not having to outwit my menfolk to get fed. If it can be thawed overnight, thrown in the crock-pot and cooked all day, it is more likely to be made than anything complicated.
And as always when I hit the onion, (which is now, my poor keyboard will smell of onions for a while) I quoted Steven Brust: "I'm a Jhereg. We sell onions."
I went and looked it up. It's from Yendi and is kind of the capper to an extended metaphor about life being like an onion, and how some of the different castes react to finding a bad spot in an onion (or their life)
All I can find online is this:
“When I say that life is like an onion, I mean this: if you don't do anything with it, it goes rotten. So far, that's no different from other vegetables. But when an onion goes bad, it can either do it from the inside, or the outside. So sometimes you see one that looks good, but the core is rotten. Other times, you can see a bad spot on it, but if you cut that out, the rest is fine. Tastes sharp, but that's what you paid for, isn't it?” --Yendi
There's more about how one group will never notice it going bad and another will throw out the whole barrel over a single spot. The final bit is "I'm a Jhereg. We sell onions." Which is true and funny, both because they are merchants, but also thieves and assassins. (the book circles back to the metaphor for the end scene as I recall)
And now I know what I'm reading after Sara M. Harvey's Music City and Diane Duane's Young Wizards. Because as much as I quote Vlad, it's been a couple decades since I visited with him.
And as always when I hit the onion, (which is now, my poor keyboard will smell of onions for a while) I quoted Steven Brust: "I'm a Jhereg. We sell onions."
I went and looked it up. It's from Yendi and is kind of the capper to an extended metaphor about life being like an onion, and how some of the different castes react to finding a bad spot in an onion (or their life)
All I can find online is this:
“When I say that life is like an onion, I mean this: if you don't do anything with it, it goes rotten. So far, that's no different from other vegetables. But when an onion goes bad, it can either do it from the inside, or the outside. So sometimes you see one that looks good, but the core is rotten. Other times, you can see a bad spot on it, but if you cut that out, the rest is fine. Tastes sharp, but that's what you paid for, isn't it?” --Yendi
There's more about how one group will never notice it going bad and another will throw out the whole barrel over a single spot. The final bit is "I'm a Jhereg. We sell onions." Which is true and funny, both because they are merchants, but also thieves and assassins. (the book circles back to the metaphor for the end scene as I recall)
And now I know what I'm reading after Sara M. Harvey's Music City and Diane Duane's Young Wizards. Because as much as I quote Vlad, it's been a couple decades since I visited with him.
Sunday, January 13, 2019
Planning for the week ahead
Monday:
put insurance in car
Work
Gym
Call law firm
call unemployment
Egg salad lunch
work
burritos or pizza
Jon's first day of the new semester!
Tuesday
Work
Pb lunch
sort out Patreon
write
work
pizza or burritos for dinner
Wednesday
work
gym
egg salad
work
pork stew
Thursday
work
gym
PB
work
chicken alfredo
Friday
work
gym
tuna salad
work
??
Saturday
9-1 Michaels
grocery shop
Goals for the Week:
1 cleaning activity per day (3 days last week, let's improve)
Play the 3 high ticket tournaments (i keep missing the 6:30)
Bed after the 830 tournament, set up the stuff and go read (paper book) until 9:15 (hollow laugh)
Read 1 book (2/3rds done)
Watch 1 movie (nope)
Finish lovey (nope)
Write 3000 words (hollow laugh)
Edit Manicurists up to land of the dead. (I got a clean copy to work from)
Make all my Swag points for the daily bonus (check!)
put insurance in car
Work
Gym
Call law firm
call unemployment
Egg salad lunch
work
burritos or pizza
Jon's first day of the new semester!
Tuesday
Work
Pb lunch
sort out Patreon
write
work
pizza or burritos for dinner
Wednesday
work
gym
egg salad
work
pork stew
Thursday
work
gym
PB
work
chicken alfredo
Friday
work
gym
tuna salad
work
??
Saturday
9-1 Michaels
grocery shop
Goals for the Week:
1 cleaning activity per day (3 days last week, let's improve)
Play the 3 high ticket tournaments (i keep missing the 6:30)
Bed after the 830 tournament, set up the stuff and go read (paper book) until 9:15 (hollow laugh)
Read 1 book (2/3rds done)
Watch 1 movie (nope)
Finish lovey (nope)
Write 3000 words (hollow laugh)
Edit Manicurists up to land of the dead. (I got a clean copy to work from)
Make all my Swag points for the daily bonus (check!)
Saturday, January 5, 2019
Planning for the Week Ahead
Goals for the Week:
1 cleaning activity per day
Play the 3 high ticket tournaments
Bed after the 830 tournament, set up the stuff and go read (paper book) until 9:15
Read 1 book
Watch 1 movie
Finish lovey
Write 3000 words
Edit Manicurists up to land of the dead.
Make all my Swag points for the daily bonus
Sunday:
Grocery shop
Work (leave at 9) 10-2:30
Dinner: ham and scalloped potatoes
laundry
make lunch
lay out for Monday
Monday:
Work
Register Jon for School
work
tax shop
pizza
Tuesday:
Work
gym/lunch/write
work
burritos for dinner
Wednesday:Work
gym/lunch/write
work
frito pie
Thursday
Work
gym/lunch/write
work
Aldis
out
Friday
Work
gym/lunch/write
work
Aldis
Mexican turkey
Saturday
Michaels 9-1
Meal plan
housework
1 cleaning activity per day
Play the 3 high ticket tournaments
Bed after the 830 tournament, set up the stuff and go read (paper book) until 9:15
Read 1 book
Watch 1 movie
Finish lovey
Write 3000 words
Edit Manicurists up to land of the dead.
Make all my Swag points for the daily bonus
Sunday:
Grocery shop
Work (leave at 9) 10-2:30
Dinner: ham and scalloped potatoes
laundry
make lunch
lay out for Monday
Monday:
Work
Register Jon for School
work
tax shop
pizza
Tuesday:
Work
gym/lunch/write
work
burritos for dinner
Wednesday:Work
gym/lunch/write
work
frito pie
Thursday
Work
gym/lunch/write
work
Aldis
out
Friday
Work
gym/lunch/write
work
Aldis
Mexican turkey
Saturday
Michaels 9-1
Meal plan
housework
Wednesday, January 2, 2019
Early January randomness
I am a man with many things on my mind.
My youngest graduates this year. Ollie is chronically ill and often has days she cannot get out of bed. I worry about how she will do with college and with life.
***
I internalized a lot of misogyny in my teens. I still have a lot of it. I hold myself superior to the women at work because I don't take 5-7 minutes in the bathroom. I've always tried to be quick in the bathroom to keep up with the guys who don't have to undress. I felt pressured to not keep them waiting on the woman.
I find as I mentally transition more, I want less to do with women. I don't want to be around them or socialize with them. I barely want to talk to them, outside of work. I haven't felt like this since college. (I went to an engineering school for a reason and a 5:1 male:female ratio was one)
I especially don't want to be around transwomen. Not only do the hormones make them crazy, as they do all adolescents, they are negation of what I am and am becoming.
***
Exposure to people unlike you does not necessarily spark empathy and reduce prejudice.
***
Side-hustling myself silly for a vacation is feeling ridiculous in the light of our actual finances. I can't do anything about those. I'm working 7 days a week as is.
***
I have no motivation whatsoever. Not to clean or write or craft. I need to find my blue yarn and finish the lovey.
***
When I was a Christian, I wondered how God could love such an awful person. As a pagan, the gods use my awfulness as part of my task. It's unpleasant.
***
A discussion came up on facebook about how "nice" is often just a cover. I like the idea I picked up on Tumblr: nice comes from the head and is about what will make the person look best. Kind is from the heart, and is concerned for the other person. Manners are a matter of habit and make people easier to live with.
I have none of the three.
***
Took the kids to see Labyrinth at the IMAX. Still sorting out why this movie, which should be very squicky, is not. I've come up with 2 things: everyone's sexual orientation is David Bowie or it's actually all about consent, which is quite healthy for an 80's film about female sexual awakening. He does nothing until she asks him to take the child, and when she tells him a definitive NO (you have no power over me), everything ends.
My youngest graduates this year. Ollie is chronically ill and often has days she cannot get out of bed. I worry about how she will do with college and with life.
***
I internalized a lot of misogyny in my teens. I still have a lot of it. I hold myself superior to the women at work because I don't take 5-7 minutes in the bathroom. I've always tried to be quick in the bathroom to keep up with the guys who don't have to undress. I felt pressured to not keep them waiting on the woman.
I find as I mentally transition more, I want less to do with women. I don't want to be around them or socialize with them. I barely want to talk to them, outside of work. I haven't felt like this since college. (I went to an engineering school for a reason and a 5:1 male:female ratio was one)
I especially don't want to be around transwomen. Not only do the hormones make them crazy, as they do all adolescents, they are negation of what I am and am becoming.
***
Exposure to people unlike you does not necessarily spark empathy and reduce prejudice.
***
Side-hustling myself silly for a vacation is feeling ridiculous in the light of our actual finances. I can't do anything about those. I'm working 7 days a week as is.
***
I have no motivation whatsoever. Not to clean or write or craft. I need to find my blue yarn and finish the lovey.
***
When I was a Christian, I wondered how God could love such an awful person. As a pagan, the gods use my awfulness as part of my task. It's unpleasant.
***
A discussion came up on facebook about how "nice" is often just a cover. I like the idea I picked up on Tumblr: nice comes from the head and is about what will make the person look best. Kind is from the heart, and is concerned for the other person. Manners are a matter of habit and make people easier to live with.
I have none of the three.
***
Took the kids to see Labyrinth at the IMAX. Still sorting out why this movie, which should be very squicky, is not. I've come up with 2 things: everyone's sexual orientation is David Bowie or it's actually all about consent, which is quite healthy for an 80's film about female sexual awakening. He does nothing until she asks him to take the child, and when she tells him a definitive NO (you have no power over me), everything ends.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)