Notes from the (fictional) Second Civil War

A few years ago, the rumor went around that liberals would launch a second civil war on July 4.
Some of us took the idea and ran with it on Twitter.

#secondcivilwarletters
Our side woefully deficient in marching music. Other side using extruded pop country product. Have taught my squad mates "March of Cambreadth"
Sound the Horn and Call the Cry/How many of them can we make die
They say it's too violent.

#secondcivilwarletters
Beloved.
Killed my first man tonight. He had attempted to steal into the encampment but I had sentry duty. I muffled his scream with a handful of kale and garroted him with my bow tie.
My hands still shake. But at least I don't have to eat the kale.

#secondcivilwarletters
Mother,
I know you fear for my safety as I march into battle. Take courage that you gave the middle name Wyatt for a reason. No, wait, you named me Marie. I am with the 32 TransForce and we will be securing bathrooms for our siblings throughout the country.

#secondcivilwarletters
Baby Girl,
coming home in a wheelchair. Battle of Target Bathrooms went in our favor but a MAGA clipped me in the sciatica and stomped my weather ankle. I fought so you don't have to.
Feeling too old for this shit,
Your genderqueer Mom.

#secondcivilwarletters
Beloved Husband,
Would I was with you, leading the PFLAG Brigade , armed with science in the face of those who need no book learning. Alas, the injury sustained with the 32nd Transforce will leave me limping manfully forever.
Your Nick

#secondcivilwarletters
After three weeks recovery, I have a new assignment, Glitter Artillery. My drag sisters have accepted me as one of them, although Sr. Claire from Accounting keeps trying to contour me. We're psyops, and hope to raise many questions among the MAGA

#secondcivilwarletters
Beloved Husband,
I hear the PFLAG Battalion has been doing wonderful work with psyops. I have left your brother-husband in charge of the household for I have been resummoned to the front.
Pray for me.
Blood! Blood and Souls for my Lord Arioch!

#secondcivilwarletters
Dear Son,
Be proud of your old man. I am in charge of a unit in the Leaflet and Glitter Artillery stationed above Memphis. We're sowing discord in Nashville.
Must go reload shells. Hitting Music Row tomorrow.
Artillery 4ever
Dad

#secondcivilwarletters
The ninja unit attached to our artillery has successfully infiltrated the enemy and strewn wigs, binders, suitcoats and heels among them. Dawn found confusion in the MAGA lines, and we took in seventy defectors as POWs. They will be sent to TransForce.



More, from all over the country can be found under the hashtag on twitter.

and a curated collection can be found here: https://www.facebook.com/libbiegrant/posts/10156197558964597